About Me

My photo
prefers a quiet life..

Monday, May 17, 2010

Dear my sad story

Aku baru sampai dari Kelantan..about 3 hours and half memecut di banjaran titwangsa, melintasi 3 negeri untuk sampai ke sungai petani. And tomorrow is working day again..sigh.
Dalam perjalanan yg panjang sorang2 tadi sempat la aku membuat beberapa flash back kenangan2 lepas yang kadang2 tak sempat aku nak fikir masa aku kat sini sebab sibuk dengan kerja.
Yang paling terkesan di hati ialah tarikh 25 April 2010 yang baru2 ni berlalu.
Kebiasaan bagi aku selama ini untuk menyambut tarikh itu dengan penuh rasa bahagia sebab itu adalah tarikh lahir seseorang yg amat bermakna dlm hidupku. Selama 7 tahun aku kenal dia, xpernah sekali aku lupa tarikh itu. Bagi aku, April adalah bulan yg indah.
Tapi berbeza tahun ini. Tahun ini, 25 April itu berlalu tanpa apa2. Tahun ini, aku berperang dengan perasaan hati sendiri untuk tidak menghubungi dia dan melupakan tarikh itu. Berperang untuk melalui hari itu tanpa makna.
Antara dia yg lahir pada hari itu dan aku sudah tidak ada apa2. Matanya yg dingin ketika melihat aku kali terakhir aku berjumpa dia masih segar dlm ingatan aku. Kali terakhir itu aku dpt merasakan betapa aku dan dia bukan lagi seperti dulu.
Jadi tidak ada maknanya untuk aku mengingati hari itu walau betapa kuatnya perasaan ini terhadapnya.
Dan tidak ada maknanya aku menghubungi dia kalau tidak ada apa untuk dia katakan pada aku lagi. Walaupun ada banyak yg ingin aku katakan padanya.
Tidak ada maknanya untuk aku terus menyambut 25 April itu saat aku tahu dia memilih untuk dingin denganku, menjauh dariku dan mewujud jurang antara dia dan aku. Walau hati ini tak mampu untuk menjauh.
Biarlah setiap hari aku mengingati dia sebagai kenangan terindah pernah kumiliki. Dan menjalani hidup dengan mendoakannya tetap bahagia dengan hidupnya tanpa aku.

Monday, May 10, 2010

LIFE is beautiful

Today is 10 May 10..

Yesterday I was post-call. After a very tiring yet exciting oncall in a very busy ward, I came back home on thank-God PM off.
After called my mom to wish happy mother's day and watch 1 episode of NurKasih, I went to sleep. Wishing to get up at night to do some revision for today's assessment and do my discharge summary which was not finished.

But I know, post-call sleep can never be trusted. True enough, I woke at 3.30am in the morning with a dream that I was already late for work. Feeling so hopeless as I studied nothing, I woke up and get refreshed to study. After a chapter on Malaria fever, I doozed off. And I woke up again at 5.30am which time to get ready for work already. With a swollen eyes due to over-slept, a dizzy head and palpitation, I went to work. I pray hard that today gonna be just fine.

Assessment is of course that bad that I received a warning letter few hours after paper markings..haha. which makes me laugh myself out as I already expected it. Then when I back to ward, clerk new patients and went to clinic and then clerk another patients..by the end of the day, I feel my heart so light. After finished my work at around 7pm, I slowly walked back to quarters. That time is sunset, which the favourite time of the day. It was so beautiful...a scenery that I always love to see. Then I think to myself...Life is not that bad, isnt it..? We only afraid to face life when we are unsure and unfamiliar about things. But when we are confident with it, we will worry about nothing.
Like wise said : In the end we will love what we familiar with..

Monday, January 18, 2010

Two is better than one

I remember what you wore on the first day
You came into my life and I thought
"Hey, you know, this could be something"
'Cause everything you do and words you say
You know that it all takes my breath away
And now I'm left with nothing

So maybe it's true
That I can't live without you
And maybe two is better than one
But there's so much time
To figure out the best of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking two is better than one

I remember every look upon your face
The way you roll your eyes
The way you taste
You make it hard for breathing
'Cause when I close my eyes and drift away
I think of you and everything's okay
I'm finally now believing

That maybe it's true
That I can't live without you
And maybe two is better than one
But there's so much time
To figure out the best of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking two is better than one


I remember what you wore on the first day
You came into my life and I thought, "Hey,"

Maybe it's true
That I can't live without you
Maybe two is better than one
But there's so much time
To figure out the best of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking
I can't live without you
'Cause, baby, two is better than one
But there's so much time
To figure out the best of my life
But I'll figure it out
When all is said and done
Two is better than one
Two is better than one